Okay so the night before last I make a rush trip to Hasting's to get an Anniversary card because I was thinking it was our anniversary (wrong again - it is the 28th - can you beat that date into my head).....so anyhow I have the child in tow - which always ends up in a "Can I get this? Can I get that?" shopping trip which really puts me at the end of my already WAAAAAAAAAYYY to short of a rope! So, after picking up two cards - one for our anniversary and one for a friend - I am looking "quickly" through the music to find a song that I want! I ask the clerk to help me and tell him the name of the song "Hollywood is not America" and he has no clue who sings it.....which, I knew it started with an "F" and it had something to do with American Idol a few years back but he says he doesn't watch that show - well, HELLOOOOOOOOO, neither do I (okay, maybe this year off and on but never before)! Anyhow - never did find the CD or song.....THANKS MISTER CLERK!
The problem ensues as I race to the checkout - leaving the child in the dust with the magnetic chess board he wants to which I have said NOOOOOOOOOOOO about 15 times! I get to the counter and I say to the clerk lady "you need to serve alcohol here I think" and she laughs as she sees the kid begging for candy now. I once again say "NO" (I know, I know - no MOM OF THE YEAR award for me). Anyhow as Angelo is reasoning with me as to WHY I should let him pick out candy the clerk says to me don't you go to Lourdes? I say "yes" and she says "that is where I recognize you from". In my head I am thinking GREAT, I have just sounded like a real witch and asked for alcohol.....what kind of person am I? About this time I am brought back to reality by my son saying "I am surprised you recognize us as we haven't been to church for forever, like 10 weeks....(actually son, it is more like six months) but okay, 10 weeks is good. She laughs at him and I say "THANKS ANG". The clerk says it is okay because she hasn't been going for awhile either. Now my child has just revealed that I have been skipping out on church and I am on the highway to hell practically! I try to explain to him that he shouldn't say things like that on our walk out to the car but he didn't see what was all wrong about what he said - HONESTY from the mouth of a babe!
He can stay home with daddy-O the next time!
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5 comments:
I love bookstores. But hastings always pisses me off because their clerks are the most unhelpful people I have ever seen.
The Customer
"Good morning! Thanks for calling us!
We're pleased to hear from you!
Your call's important to us
So we've placed you in a queue.
Please find your account number and
Be sure it is correct..
It's twenty digits long and if you
Mis-type, I'll reject.
I'll lead you through the whole routine
Please use your touch type phone.
Press eight and follow with the hash
After you hear the tone.
If you are a new client here..
Press two, ..if old, press three.
Press four in case we've done something
With which you disagree!
You have pressed four, please wait a moment
While I transfer you..
And please enjoy, while we play you
A symphony or two!
Our staff are all too busy now
To talk to such as you
Your call is so important that
We've placed you in a queue."
Time passes and the music lingers
On, and bye and bye..
My cheek and ear go fast asleep,
My wrist gets R.S.I.
But wait! It may be there is hope!
I hear a ringing sound,
At last a human voice is heard
After the runaround!
"Good morning, this is Ladies wear
And may we help somehow?
Complaints?.. Oh! Just hang on a tick
I'll transfer you right now!..."
"Good morning! Thanks for calling us!
We're pleased to hear from you!
Your call's important to us
So we've placed you in a queue."
Frank Halliwell
That is so funny. But people are people and they are not perfect.
Ferras, thats the name of the band
www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbFXK6xocMw
thats the link to the video
Born Helena Jane
With a restless soul
She moved west to California
Became a centerfold
But once you change your name
Well the pieces fall
Now she hardly recognizes herself at all
And there’s never any rain, when you want it
A hollow little game, and you’ve won it
Looking for a thrill but you’ve done it all
So long, put your blue jeans back on girl
Go home
Remember Hollywood’s not America
So long put your blue jeans back on girl
Go home
Remember Hollywood’s not America
O yea
And everybody here's
from somewhere else
You can make a million dollars, but you might lose yourself
And you can take the heat will your heart grow cold
They say acting’s just pretending, but even that gets old
And there’s never any rain, when you want it
A hollow little game, and you’ve won it
Looking for a thrill but you’ve done it all
So long, put your blue jeans back on girl
Go home
Remember Hollywood’s not America
So long put your blue jeans back on girl
Go home
Remember Hollywood’s not America
And I know what you do when
I know that you
You can be anything you want to be
So long, put your blue jeans back on girl
Go home
Remember Hollywood’s not America
So long put your blue jeans back on girl
Go home
Remember Hollywood’s not America
Hollywood’s not America
It’s not America
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